Yeah I know.

"Choose twelve of your original characters, and list them without peeking at the questions. (Promise me that you won't! You'll subconsciously ruin it if you do!)"

1. Shaka: The sexy Empress of Daganta
2. Sheyoudin: President of Daganta and BF of Shaka, both former
3. Itaka: Shaka's wife, proud holder of Finest Chest of Daganta
4. Mernad: Self-possessed Prince of Maldizion
5. Samari: Itaka's sister, basically hates everybody else
6. Isron: A Sabinaree who Yava wants put in the can
7. Yava: A Sabinaree who does whatever the hell she want
8. Attila: Shaka's husband, a vampire, of sorts
9. Sime: Nutty former Empress of Daganta, shares Shaka's genes
10. Katave: A paranoid Sabinaree also known as YWHW or Allah
11. Sibyl: Awesome superdramatic teenage girl with an IQ over 300
12. Kay: Gey former Emperor of Daganta, Shaka's uncle

(1) Who would make a better college professor, 6 (Isron) or 11 (Sibyl)? Sibyl for sure. Isron is smarter than most Sabinarees combined but who cares? Sibyl is smarter and perhaps more awesome. Isron would be a boring lecturer.

(2) Do you think 2 (Sheyoudin) is hot? How hot? Um let me put it this way YES. And how? YES.

(3) 12 (Kay) sends 8 (Attila) on a mission. What is it, and does it succeed? Kay sends Attila on a mission to bring his long lost favourite consort back into his sexy harem. When Attila realises that the long-lost consort is Sheyoudin he challenges Sheyoudin in Two-Step Quenghi and drinks his blood. FISSION MAILED.

(4) What is or would be 9's (Sime's) favourite book? HA! "The Art of War".

(5) Would it make sense for 2 (Sheyoudin) to swear fealty to 6 (Isron), or the other way around? YES? Sheyoudin is an Isronist and basically worships Isron. So he already swore fealty in that particular direction now didn't he.

(6) For some reason 5 (Samari) is looking for a roommate. Should it share a studio apartment with 9 (Sime) or with 10 (Katave)? Hehe! Well Samari and Sime would have fun together. When they go out for drinks Samari will drink Sime under the table, but Sime will be the one to take pictures when Samari dances on the bar flashing her boobs.

(7) 2 (Sheyoudin), 7 (Yava) and 12 (Kay) have dinner together. Where do they go, and what do they discuss? They go to a brown pub, drink beers and talk smack. Yava smokes too much pot and gets paranoid that Sheyoudin and Kay are giggling about her in the bathroom. She doesn't realise that Sheyoudin is nailing Kay in there. Yava goes home alone, stoned and dejected.

(8) 3 (Itaka) challenges 10 (Katave) to a duel. What happens? Itaka opens with her only attack: Boob Smother. Katave drowns happy. Itaka wins!

(9) If 1 (Shaka) stole 8's (Attila's) most precious possession, how would he get it back? Shaka steals the key to the Palace's meth lab and stases herself for forty years. Attila stases himself to get it back, but when they wake up the meth lab has been converted to a candy shop. =[

(10) Suggest a title for a story in which 7 (Yava) and 12 (Kay) both obtain what they most desire. Uh ok. So their desires don't converge very well. Yava most desires to get Isron in the can (PRISON!!). Kay most desires for Shaka to live (that's why he dies.) Srsly idno.

(11) What kind of plot device would you use is you wanted 4 (Mernad) and 1 (Shaka) to work together? How about the plot device of my third novel. First half of it that is.

(12) If 7 (Yava) visited you for the weekend, how would you get along? O shit I have no idea. We'd smoke pot and watch "Monsters Inc."? For three days.

(13) If you could command 3 (Itaka) to perform any task or service for you, what would it be? Itaka, please come to Japan with me and attract guys with your ZZ cups?

(14) Does anyone on your friends list write or draw 11 (Sibyl)? Not as far as I know!

(15) If 2 (Sheyoudin) had to choose sides between 4 (Mernad) and 5 (Samari), who would it be? Sheyoudin isn't particularly fond of either. Samari I guess. She's Itaka's sister after all, and who doesn't have a weak spot for Itaka.

(16) What might 10 (Katave) shout whilst charging into battle? ALLAHU AKHBAR!!

(17) If you chose a song to represent 8 (Attila), which song would you choose? Oh oh I know this one pick me! Nine Inch Nails - The Great Below.

(18) 1 (Shaka), 6 (Isron) and 12 (Kay) are having dim sum at a Chinese restaurant. There is only one scallion pancake left, and they all reach for it at the same time. Who gets to eat it? Kay is presentable enough to use his chopsticks, but this strategy is absolutely faulty. Shaka grabs at the pancake with both hands and crams it in her pie hole. Just as her stomach protests that she's eaten herself sick Isron orders another round.

(19) What might be a good pick-up line for 2 (Sheyoudin) to use on 10 (Katave)? Katave is a homophobic bigot, I'm sorry Sheyoudin. I know he's got a body out of this world and ivory skin smooth as milk but there is no such pickup line that'll work on the guy.

(20) What would 5 (Samari) be most likely arrested for? Murder? Death threats? Extortion? Date rape? Anything?

(21) What is 6's (Isron's) secret? What he did to Yava that made her hate him until the end of time. We will never know!

(22) If 11 (Sibyl) and 9 (Sime) were racing to a destination, who would get there first? Sibyl would think up a way to levitate and fly there. Sibyl wins. Sorry Sime!

(23) If you had to walk home through a bad neighbourhood late at night, would you feel safer in the company of 7 (Yava) or of 8 (Attila)? Attila I guess? Each are equally capable of protecting a girl's honour. But Attila would be more fun to hang out with.

(24) What title would you give this fic? 1 (Shaka) and 9 (Sime) reluctantly team up to save the world from the threat posed by 4's (Mernad's) sinister secret organization. 11 (Sibyl) offers to help them, but it is later discovered that she is actually a spy for 4 (Mernad). Meanwhile, 4 (Mernad) has kidnapped 12 (Kay) in an attempt to force their surrender. Following the wise advice of 5 (Samari), they seek out 3 (Itaka), who gives them what they need to complete their quest. Ho shit how this actually makes a degree of sense? Title? Hell if I know but I'd read it.

Yeah that's it. ^_^